I don't know what happened! Maybe it was blogging about being oppositional and defiant.
I went out with Barb, Ron, and Natalie to the Day of the Dead Art Show and dinner. First of all, I had two beers. Then, I had my usual DeColores dinner of a bowl of beans with green chili and ketchup. And three bowls of salsa. That was OK.
Then (here's the unconscious part), I had HALF of Natalie's veggie burger. The half that she was planning to take home and eat for lunch tomorrow. I ate it while she was waiting for the take-out box. AND..... I ate it while Natalie was in the bathroom!
I wasn't hungry. It just tasted so damn good.
I've been pretty good at reminding myself - when I want something really bad (like pizza) - that I can have it "later" - after I've lost weight.
You'd have thought there was NEVER going to be another veggie burger ever made in the world!
And I'd never even eaten a veggie burger until about a month ago. This was just the third time I'd
The half of veggie burger, in and of itself, is not the problem. The problem is the fact that THIS COULD BE JUST THE BEGINNING.
I have to remember:
1. That's it's OK to screw up.
2. I can do something different that my usual response of "Oh, fuck it!"
3. I don't have to punish myself by giving up.
3. I can start again right now.
This... THIS EXACT EXPERIENCE.... is my #1 problem. This is what keeps me fat. THIS is why I'm blogging. To make it past these speed bumps in the road.
That's all it is - a speed bump. I don't have to wreck the damn car.
Think good thoughts - pray - send positive vibes. I need all the help I can get.