Good Morning! Welcome to the Monday Morning TRUTH, ACCOUNTABILITY, and PLAN meeting in Jennyland!
My name is Jenny and I weigh 233.5 pounds.
Hi. I've had a three pound gain since this time last week and I HATE-HATE-HATE-HATE-HATE it.
Jenny, I'm glad you came clean about your weight today. Why do you think it happened?
Well, I just wasn't careful. I didn't binge but I ate what I knew I should eat - then a little bit more. All weekend.
For example, I ate half a bowl of spaghetti sauce at Becky's on Saturday, but then while cleaning her kitchen, I ate three big serving spoons right out of the spaghetti sauce pot! Last night, I ordered grilled chicken salad and I ate that, then some of Elisa's fajita chicken and veggies - and half her bowl of beans.
I ....... cheated.
And I didn't exercise. Not all week.
What did you learn from this week?
Well, Invisible Person, I learned lots of things, I think.
1. I learned not to order a damn salad at a Mexican food restaurant. Why set myself up that way? It makes me feel like I have to eat the salad because I bought it, and then, I have to eat someone else's Mexican food to feel fulfilled. I would have had probably half the calories if I had just ordered chicken fajitas for myself in the first place.
2. I learned I really need to work on stronger boundaries around my PLANNED meals. Just like I "nickle-and-dimed" myself into the poor house, I can "just-one-tiny-bite" myself into the fat house. At Becky's house, the serving spoonfuls of spaghetti sauce, the two bites of cake, the cleaning out the olive bowl by cramming them in my mouth, the cleaning the cake plate by using my finger to get all the leftover icing....... those strategies don't seem to work for me.
I have to stop being the one to clean up. ;-)
3. I learned that I easily spin out of control. What triggers my spinning is lack of planning, a change in plans, being emotionally unsettled with fear/sadness/ exhaustion/hunger, and alcohol. I need to do whatever I can to ward off those spinny things.
So, Jenny.... what are your intentions THIS week to make things go smoother?
Well, I only have four days of work, then I'm spending the long weekend in Albuquerque.
So here's my plans for the next four days:
* Go to the Y three days this week and get on the treadmill - even if its only for five minutes. My knee is really hurting today, but I can do anything - ANYTHING - for five minutes.
* Eat at home or eat Subway. Even a whole can of tomato soup and cheese toast at my house probably has less calories than most things I eat in a restaurant. And Subway is always safe for me. I need to stay in my safety zones this week. Unfortunately, my kitchen is one of my safe places. I don't pig out at my own house.
* DRINK WATER. So far today? None. I have to decide on a MINIMUM and at least make myself drink that much. I can do days without any pure water.
* No alcohol. It's just empty calories. And it makes me more impulsive and more at risk of saying "what the hell....".
* Read the first lesson in the book, A Course In Weight Loss.
Thank you, Jenny.
Now it's time to stop monopolizing the meeting and let other people have their turn.
Shhhhhhhh, Jenny! I know I'm invisible but I'm still in charge of this meeting!!
Would anyone else like to share their intentions for this week?