Saturday, December 3, 2011

Eating The Middle

Today was Day 2 of Dianne's visit and IT WAS SUCCESSFUL!

I also learned a technique for eating less that (embarrassingly) fits my personality. But, it works.

I've told you about my friend, Barb, who always gets a take-home box at restaurants before she even starts eating. She halves her food and takes one half of it home to her husband. (Who never gets to go out and only gets to eat the leftover half of other people's food).

No really, its a very generous, considerate thing that Barb does and I've always been impressed, but not able to do it. I'm too much of a glutton and too selfish.

Today, I came up with my own technique.
Please pay no attention to all the salsa and ketchup but notice that I just ate the middle of my omelet. I can also do this with burritos, sandwiches, and burgers.

It differs from what Barb does because, being a only-child-princess, I take the best part and I don't give a shit who (if anyone) gets the sides.
(Me in my Princess Santa hat)


Maybe the restaurant sends my leftover omelet sides to the poor children in China.

You know...... those poor children that our mothers told us about every.single.day when we were growing up if we didn't clean our plates. The reasoning behind it never made much sense to me.

Your mother never told you about those kids? Well, my mom must have had some inside information because she talked about them all the time...

The conversation between my mother and me would be:

"Jenny, you eat all that spaghetti on your plate right now or we're going to have to send it to the poor starving children in China".

"Well, if they're hungry, maybe we should send them this food. I don't mind."

"No! Your eyes were bigger than your stomach, young lady, so you have to clean that plate right now or we'll send it to the poor starving children in China! Now, stop talking and EAT!"

"But I want to help them!"

"Jennifer Jean Branch, you close your mouth and eat every last bite on that plate. NOW!"

I think this may have something to do with me being an overweight, bleeding-heart, left-wing social worker.

But it is one more tool to add to my ever-growing toolbox to use in my quest to be a skinny eater.

Love,
Princess Santa

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