I've been dreading this and putting off my need to write about it. My visual of little Jenny is that she is somewhere inside of me, sitting cross-legged, arms crossed over her chest, with a sulking, ferocious frown on her face.
Something like a combination of all the following:
Since my last post, I have become one year older..... and NINE AND A HALF POUNDS HEAVIER.
There. I said it.
Now, can we please stop eating???????
I don't want to wallow in this. I don't want to justify my "letscelebrateturning58inallsortsofhealthywayslikejumpingoffhighdivingboardsandothershitbutletsbalanceoutthegoodthingsbyrepeatedlycrammingourmouthfulltothepointthatwearemiserableandfullofdisgust". I don't want to analyze all the 'whys' and 'how comes'. I don't want to look at the fact that I got to 201.5 and BOUNCED BACK up to 211 - repeating a well known and much hated pattern in my life.
I just want to S.T.O.P.
I'm done with this going backwards. I've done it. It's over.
Tomorrow. Things are gonna get back on track.
Cut it out, Jenny!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!