Thank you, my friends, for you support today. For your kind support, and your "put on your big girl panties" support. I needed both.
I really do have to blog every day. It needs to not matter whether I'm feeling like I have something clever and witty to say. I have to do it for ME.
I learned something in my earlier blog when I said "I'm lost. Blogging helps me know where I am." That was one of those truths that I didn't know until I wrote it.
Blogging does help me know where I am. It's like saying,
I AM HERE.
And if I know where I am, I know better where I want to go.
When I'm not blogging, I'm most likely living with my eyes shut and making hedonistic choices based on what feels best to my body at the moment. Not what's good for my body, but what I W.A.N.T.
Do you know what I mean?
I need to realize (and remember) that my hedonistic tendencies are my ENEMY. I just googled "hedonistic tendencies" and this is what showed up:
A hedonistic tendency would be a tendency towards anything pleasurable
or too self-indulgent. Things that generally fall under hedonism are
sex, excessive partying, alcohol, gluttony, drugs, living excessively,
living lavishly, being greedy, wasting money, wasting money on yourself,
Uh, helllloooooo. All of that pertains to me except the sex and the drugs. And they left out food.
Obviously, the people who wrote the definition weren't overeaters.